Cantankerous Citrus

Lenny the Key lime tree is most always a prick; insists I call him Leonard, when being a dick.

He’s skinny and scrawny, thorny and lean; grotesquely anti-social, he even looks mean.

“If you expect,” he says, “to get some of these, then prune me, water me; I’ll give what I please.”

“Hey, come move me! I need lots of light!” the thorny bastard barks, till I get it just right.

What the hell, Leonard? Why always so dour? “Duh, dumb ass. It’s what makes the limes sour.”

~g